Cheerleader of The Week

Our basketball team may be a bunch of choking idiots, but for once there is a hot cheerleader.


Go Blue

Vince Carter - UNDERrated?

I think every member of mVs who concerns themselves with such things has at one point or another thought of Vince Carter as being selfish/childish/immature. His lack of effort on the court has been nearly as evident as his talent. So you'd think the savvier GM's in the NBA would keep away. And yet Truehoop notes...

The Spurs, Rockets, and Blazers are three of the stat-geekiest teams out there. If they're the ones lining up to pay Carter's massive salary in his waning years, they must see something special.

Check the link for more details, but various statistical indicators look good:

-25th in PER behind only Dwyane Wade, Kobe Bryant, Brandon Roy and Manu Ginobili at his position
-top 40 in adjusted +/-
-people who chart aspects of defensive efficacy privately... say that, despite his reputation, Carter has been a pretty good defender
-12th in the NBA in points per crunch time minute

David Thorpe:

"If the Spurs, Rockets, or Blazers get Vince Carter without giving up much," he says, "they join the Lakers right there as the favorites in the Western Conference.

"
Maybe VC is this year's KG or '04's Sheed.

Pretty sure I'd give up Outlaw, LaFrentz and a few prospects/picks for those results...

Actual Dual-Threats

Steven Threat was going to start the first two games for Michigan this season before developing pressure sores on his arse after using it to sit on a bench till early January 2012. But now he's gone Sarah Palin and transferred to his 14th college, which means one of us has to update Lank's post from last summer that illustrated our QB situation:



So, updated:



At least they look like they're having fun, non? At the very least neither Forcier nor Robinson look like accountants, so we've already won four more games than we did last year.

JFC

I went ahead and checked the ol' Yahoo! the other night for a quick sports update before bed and read this:



Hmm. A friend and I like to throw around a phrase to describe self-serving hypocritical asshole fuckers: self-righteous dissembling cunts. or: sanctimonious dicks. or simply: douchbag.

That first one - about Michael Phelps smoking something grown with dirt, rain, and sunshine rather than something laced with ammonia, tar, amyl butyrate, citronella oil, dehydromenthofurolactone, and the 4000 other things they stick in cigarettes - is particularly interesting in a legal climate that allows our government to play Shock and Awe™ on an Arab's balls but railroads anyone who may have attended a single college par-tay and had a contact buzz. A great policy considering 25% of the world's incarcerated population lives in American prisons. Also great is the drug war at large, obviously. I mean, nothing new to say here, but for the reals, please track down Michael Phelps and all the other one-hitters busy hammering away at the foundations of America and our democracy. I never took a single economics course and don't understand anything I read in the Wall St. Journal, so I'm perfectly cognizant of the way black markets emerge once you legislate against something so abundant and then use the occasional crackdown to add incentive for participation by those who were laid off in this awesome economy. I'd point out the counter-intuitiveness of our drug policy, but the prison-industrial complex is so dope [jajaja!] because your friends get elected to government and make enough stupid laws so there are always enough criminals that the construction company whose stock you own will have to build 9000 more prisons for the corrections corporation that's also part of your portfolio. Jesus, it was a bong hit. It's not like he was listening to Cypress Hill.

As for that second story, about Bud Selig, well, look at him:



It's not like I have to write anything to convey what an insufferable prick he is. Shamed the game? Selah, dick. I remember reading "Casey at the Bat" when I was younger and how it was illustrated to caricature Casey's might. Something like:



Then Bud Selig took over as MLB Commissioner and those illustrations lost their entire relevance because, whatevs, he looks just like any other 2nd base journeyman who hits 30 home runs a year. Of more concern now is why the other players in "Casey at the Bat" aren't eating enough. Let's see: growing up a player could win the home run crown with 35 - 40 home runs; now, that's probably not enough to warrant a new contract. So, basically, this wanker presided over MLB's merger with the WWE and then held a press conference to criticize one of his players for responding to environmental cues. I get that everyone knows you know, and that you know everyone knows you know, and that you have to deny you know because if everyone who knows you know knew you know they'd feign umbrage that their trust was violated, but seriously, at what point does the make-believe stop? At least I support the only team in MLB without a single 'roider.

And that third story: Roger Clemens has a small pee pee.

O'Neal-Marion Part II

I think that's enough already.

Youth Movement: Michigan Basketball

This is our big man, DeShawn Sims:




Explanation here and apologies to Mssr. Adviser's hyperlink preferences here.

Worst Coach Ever!

The two most disappointing teams in the NBA this season must be the Phoenix Suns and the Detroit Pistons. Much of the blame has to fall on the coaching staffs involved. These are teams whose core has remained similar from great successes in the past (under better regarded coaches who have moved on to success with other franchises).

Terry Porter and Michael Curry are rookie coaches who lack experience and somehow used their cache from being a role-playing NBA player to obtain their position. Their incompetence is clear. These teams have major chemistry issues and seem to regress with each new game. (Its also clear that certain player acquisitions may have exacerbated the concerns over selfishness and style-of-play on the Suns and a lack of fire on the Pistons, but these issues were present before and after the arrival of these coaches. They haven't helped a thing.)

I think its fair to say their brief tenures have been complete failure. But what else do Curry and Porter have in common?

They learned from one of the all time worst coaches in the history of the NBA whose staff they both served in 2006-2007. Maybe they took good notes and copied off each other during their practicum in head coaching from The Worst Coach Ever.

Who deserves this name? Only one man. Flip Saunders.

Flip got his first NBA coaching job because he happened to be college roommates with Kevin Mchale (Minn's GM). I'm sure its a total coincidence that an elite NBA player and elite basketball coach just HAPPENED to land in the same dorm room. Or maybe he used his connections with the Mussleman familsy (former GM Bill and son Eric) as well as McHale to land posh jobs he wasn't qualified for.

Then he proceeded, along with McHale, to bungle that franchise through a decade of having the best player in basketball - Kevin Garnett. Little if any success came despite a unique talent like KG.

Somehow after that, Retread Flip managed to land the Detroit Pistons' coaching job after they to two consecutive NBA finals. He ground these champions into also-rans and the players lost all respect for him within 1 year, when he was fired.

Also, he's a fucking weirdo. Which might be great in and of itself, but when you're a total asshole its grating.



Flip Saunders - the gift of suck that keeps on giving. So say thanks Pistons and Suns fan. His legacy lives on.

Michigan's New Fullback

Not this year, but probably soon will be...

Calvin Smith, Joliet Catholic Academy, FB, 6'2" 235

Michigan picked up a preferred walkon from the Illinois fullback. Rodriguez may have found the next Owen Schmitt (Seahawks FB), who had almost identical size. Probably next in line after Moundros, who'll be a junior this season. Vince Helmuth is now a DT.


"Coach Rodriguez said all his fullbacks start out as walkons. But he has had 30 walkons total in five years who eventually were on scholarship."

"...the fullback gets about 40 plays a game, with the goal line situations, in the red zone, when you need an extra blocker, that sort of thing."

I'm On A Boat (ft. T-Pain) - Album Version

It's Finally Here

Since the genesis of this site, we've debated Oden vs. Durant. Men vs Sports was split on who the Blazers should draft with their #1 pick and over time actually diverged from reaching a consensus. Some were in love with the media hype about the big man's upside while others frustratedly appealed to deaf ears "why not take the sure bet?"



Now it's a good 18 months later and we finally get to see them play head to head tonight. The players have developed in very different ways but the debate continues. Durant has averaged 28 and 7 and has shot 47% with the worst supporting cast in the league while Oden continues to improve despite looking a bit clunky during the majority of his minutes. Some have said that Durant would not be a good fit for this Blazers team anyway, while others point to his scoring proficiency and think that shit would be nice to have.

Let the debate rage on.

THE Reason To Be Excited About The Lions

#5 chronologically, but #1 in priority.

Jim Schwartz, Head Coach, 42

When I imagine an ideal head coaching candidate he is young, smart, proven, dedicated and brings something to the table that differentiates him from everyone. (Which may be redundant since I'm not sure most coaches are very smart.) Talent is of the utmost importance, but what can a coach do to make an impact, beyond "not screwing up"? He has to have something that makes him different.

Jim Schwartz is exactly that guy.

You want proven experience?

Schwartz came up under Bill Belichick and ended up the Tennessee Titans' defensive coordinator from 2001 until 2008. That is the same Titans who had the best D in the NFL this season.

You want smart?

Schwartz was a four-year letterman at linebacker for the Hoyas of Georgetown University, where he earned his degree in economics. He also received Distinguished Economics Graduate honors at Georgetown and earned numerous honors in 1988, including Division III CoSIDA/GTE Academic All-America, All-America, and team captain.

You wanted dedicated?

Jim Schwartz began an unpaid internship with the old Cleveland Browns, driving scouts and players to the airport, and buying cigarettes for the coaches

You want young?

He began as a graduate assistant in college, worked his way up as a positional coach at low-level schools like NC Central and Colgate. Once he got to the NFL he sky rocketed from being a scout under Belichik in 1993 to a defensive coordinator in 2001.

But what about Schwartz has Lank saying Schwing? What differentiates him from others?

Statistical Analysis.

As profiled in the New York Times and Smart Football, both excellent reads BTW. Here's some notable sections.

Unorthodox thinking ... has earned Schwartz, 42, a reputation as one of the N.F.L.’s leading practitioners of statistical analysis — “Moneyball” for the shoulder-pad set . . . Belichick regards Schwartz as one of the smartest coaches he has been around.

Schwartz ...(is) the NFL's version of Billy Beane, the empirically minded general manager of the Oakland A's made famous (and in some circles, infamous) in Michael Lewis' great book, Moneyball. Beane, as you may remember, helped revolutionize baseball by favoring detailed statistical analysis to aid him in determining his draft picks, batting order, and pitchers. It famously led him to pick up and use guys no one else had any interest in or had even heard of.

The A's repeatedly made the playoffs despite having a payroll a mere fraction not only of juggernauts like the Yankees, but most other teams in their division and around the league. Lewis' answer to the question "How was Beane doing it?" was that Beane was outsmarting his opponents. It was not necessarily that he was smarter, but his approach was: the A's were willing to do away with "common wisdom" and even the kind of impressions most scouts give regarding a prospect: "Wow, look at the guns on him. He just looks like a baseball player." As a result, the A's routinely beat teams with payrolls twice theirs. And, now, the so-called sabermetric revolution has almost entirely swept through baseball. Even teams that don't rely on it as heavily as the A's still have some guys with laptops and Ivy League degrees slipping around their front offices these days.

That's not say he's a mindless numbers guy.

Schwartz has met with the developers of a computer program to analyze difficult play-calling decisions, and he has watched film with Aaron Schatz, an author of “Pro Football Prospectus,” who uses unusual statistics to analyze the game. But at the same time, Schwartz shuns the impression that creates, stressing that statistics are just another tool in game preparation.

“People talk about the chess match between coaches and coordinators,” Schwartz said. “Anybody who plays chess knows your rook never falls down, your rook never stops one spot short. There’s human nature to football that will never make it into a game of numbers.”

Smart Football goes on to discuss how researched game-planning, statistical analysis, thinking outside of cliche, and systematic searches for unusual talent are all good ideas that a guy like Schwartz will pursue. Read on, if you're not convinced.

As for Lank, he is. The Lions hired the perfect coach.

The Question

On ESPN's homepage today they have an interesting poll. At the age of 24, who would you most like to have play for your team? Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, or Michael Jordan?

The clear winner so far on ESPN is Michael, and fair enough since his career is played out and you know what you would get from him. The thing I found most interesting is that only 11% of people said Kobe. The way I see it there are only two explanations for this.

1. Kobe permanently damaged his reputation and likability and this is causing people to choose LeBron who seems much more likable and hasn't been tried for rape.

2. People prefer potential to the actual.

Again, if you go by titles, how many does LeBron have? That's right, none. Kobe? 3. Not quite MJ's 6 but still better than most players. I know championships are a flawed arguement since it takes a team to win one, but still. And at 24 Kobe was on his way to his 3rd championship. Where are LeBron's?

Reason #4 to Be Excited about the Lions

Apparently reason #4 is waiting around for a good reason to be excited about the Lions, which makes sense. If I have children, and they have grandchildren, their great-grandchildren could actually see the Lions win a playoff game, assuming Calvin Johnson stays healthy well into his 90s.